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Rapid Reads

The Gay Senator who Opposes

Gay Marriage

He wasn’t homophobic.

He wasn’t a bigot, nor a Christian zealot.

No, actually, the Congressman voted against legalizing gay marriage because he was a slut.

When the Supreme Court ruled in favor of legalizing gay marriage in the U.S., the Congressman didn’t cry and drink himself drunk because the ruling went against his moral convictions.  He wasn’t upset because he thought this country of his was ‘going to hell in a hand basket.’ He didn’t believe in the slippery slope theory, where bestiality obviously was next to be legalized.

                No, the Congressman cried and drank himself silly because he is a homosexual.

                Despite that he’s married to a woman and has two adorable children, the Congressman prefers the love of another man.

Well, let’s be honest.  He prefers the love of many men.

                And this is why he opposed gay marriage

                Before the law passed, the Congressman enjoyed the luxury that came with the prohibition of gay marriage.  During this time, the Congressman dated many men, all kinds of men. Around D.C., the gay scene was his playground- a place he could go crazy and unleash his true desires without having to make a single commitment to another soul.  When one of his usual play dates developed feelings for him, the Congressman would say, “You know if ‘things’ were different, we would be together and live a normal life, but they’re just not.”  When the tall and hot Italian bar tender served him another drink ‘on the house’ said, “I love you,”  the Congressman replied, “I love you too, but as you know, this is as far as we can take it.”  When he traveled to Connecticut with another play date, a special agent for the FBI, he was asked, “why are you married?”  He answered, “I want to make a difference in politics, but I can’t win an election if I come out of the closet.”

                Now, the playground has closed.

                Now, all the men that he lied to are seeking that commitment from him. 

                “Let’s make it official,” they tell him.  “Look, you can get divorce and no will care,” all his lovers declare.  “Come out to the public, they’ll love you for it,” they say.  

                The Congressman would rather not say or declare anything to anyone.  He misses those days of living with countless secrets and lies.  He misses those days, where he receives all that love without being accountable to a single soul, without having to make a single commitment. 

What can you say?  He’s about to break many people’s hearts. 

He’s a damn good politician.  

He’ll probably be president someday.